April 28, 2012 by Kim
It is official…. Shuffling and Tether-Ball have completely taken over our lives.
Dickie has made sure of that.
Did you notice how I capitalized both words? It was done out of fear… Fear that if Dickie passes behind me during the writing of this entry and sees that these sacred words have not been shown their proper respect, something bad will happen.
I might get a decent head start, though… as he attempts to sound them out
Hopefully, this time I’ll be able to control my breathing in whichever crevice I choose to hide. That damned anxiety-attack induced hyperventilation will give me away every time.
Don’t judge me! Dickie can be a true force to be reckoned with.
So back to the tpoic, on hand…
Shit…. Damnit, Hologram Tupac, you can’t just be busting in here, disrupting my entry!!!
Oh, come on…. you heard me. I’m trying to tell a story here… You need to go.
Really, Hologram Tupac? You think you can just bring in Snoop, start dancing and I’m gonna let you stay? It’s not all about YOU, Hologram Tupac!!! This post is about Dickie… do you REALLY want to piss this kid off?
Yeah, yeah, yeah… I’m sorry, but you got to go….
Ok…. crap. Where were we?
Oh, the TOPIC at hand.
Shuffling and Tether ball.
Shuffling has been part of Dickie’s life since he first laid eyes on an LMFAO music video.
He. Was. Entranced.
and next thing I knew Shuffling became a regular everyday movement, for him
Every day he walks, talks, eats, plays, runs, rolls, jumps…
and every day he’s shuffling.
I’m not even kidding.
At any random moment you can enter a room, and there he is… shuffling his little ass off. Oblivious to everything.
You ask him to go do something… he shuffles away to either do it or to pretend he never heard your request.
You attempt to reprimand or punish him… he shuffles
The shuffle that follows him getting into trouble is usually the most complex shuffle you will see him do. He has always zoned out when voices begin to raise… But “going to his happy place” COMBINED with intricate Shuffling? It can make remaining upset a little difficult.
The LMFAO CD was purchased about a month or 2 ago… Since then “Part Rock Anthem” has been religiously placed on auto repeat for every second that Dickie is in the vehicle. He will go to great lengths to make sure that he gets into the truck before anyone else so he can stretch over the front seat, quickly change the radio to CD mode and maneuver to track 3. If we are taking the car somewhere and the CD happens to still be in the truck, I have no doubt that he would throw himself out of the moving vehicle to run home and collect his prized CD. There are also rules to be followed while listening to the song, inside a vehicle. Dickie Rules. I am only allowed to sing along with the “girl part”… Dickie and Hubs are both allowed to sing along with the “boy parts” and Dickie’s older brothers are only allowed to participate with Dickie’s exclusive prior approval. One afternoon, a few weeks ago, Daniel got a wild hair up his ass and decided that he was going to attempt to belt out the entire song, while listening to it in the car.
Dickie seriously lost his shit… and fast. He commanded Daniel to stop… multiple times. Daniel ignored. He pleaded with us to make Daniel stop. We were too busy trying to hide our laughter, to assist. When he physically began to attempt removing Daniel’s vocal cords, we finally intervened and told Daniel to stop.
Yeah, I guess we could have told Dickie to stop being a… dick. But, to be quite honest with you, Daniel’s pubescent singing voice is something nobody should ever have to hear. So I was kind of Team Dickie on that one.
Dickie has engaged me in several Shuffling classes, since LMFAO has taken over our lives…. Needless to say, kids within the spectrum can be interesting teachers.
“You put foot like dis, and other foot like dis”
*Dickie stands with one foot in the front, one foot in the back*
“and den you do dis”
*quickly switches both feet*
“and den you Shuffling”
*shuffles a circle around me*
I will admit that he does applaud every attempt I make at his beloved Shuffling
but, what can I say… He’s gets it from his Momma.
Well, I could continue to go on and on and on about Shuffling… But I have a feeling Shuffling is going to be part of this household for a long time…. and there will be plenty more opportunities to share the tale of the Shuffle with you, to come.
…and I haven’t even touched the topic of Tether-Ball yet
Now, you may wonder… with all this constant Shuffling, how could there possibly be time for Tether-Ball?
This little excursion, into my mind, is about to get exhausting…
*to be continued*