Too Much of a Good Thing…

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February 27, 2012 by Kim


I live in a strange… bewildering land

A land where things that have always been known to be true

are proven false… effortlessly

Let me spin a little story for you

Picture this, if you will…

It’s a Friday night, like most other Friday nights

Hubs and I were beginning to feel a little bit restless so we head out to a local bar

I had made a promise, to myself, that I would stick to my diet and decided to consume only water…

Photo Credit: etc.usf.edu

It was a first for me

So the night proceeded as most nights out do… There were smiles and laughter and good times to be had

I noticed how convenient it was to throw back the ice water… no fear of a hangover…. no fear of acting a fool

It was all good

As the night ended, we returned to our home.  I grinned as I drifted off to sleep… tomorrow I was going to feel awesome

with a capital “a” even

Awesome

Dare I say add an exclamation point?

Awesome!

Caps loc?

Ok, we’re getting out of hand here…

so, off to sleep I drifted

*******

I awoke with a start.  The room was dark…. Dark, Dark

Caps Loc? Yes.

DARK

3AM dark…

I felt my entire body shaking, almost violently

It took me about 3 minutes of laying there….in the dark, to realize that the steady intense pulsing was centered at my heart

Photo Credit: realmagick.com

My heart was pounding so hard, within my chest, that it was jolting me from head to toe

and now that I had found the core of my discomfort, I immediately took note of the speed in which my heart was thumping

My heart rate was easily 2 to 3 times faster than its normal rate.

I had just woken up…. what was happening to me?

As I rose, carefully, from the bed I was struck by how “out-of-it” I felt

I crossed the bedroom and entered our bathroom… staring into the mirror that hangs from the wall.

The girl staring back at me had a slightly detached look about her… I did not fail to notice that the image before me seemed to vibrate in time with my furious heart.

Pounding Pounding Pounding

It was almost is if my heart was trying to escape… me

I made my way down the hall and brought myself to rest at our computer desk.

My concern over the way I was currently feeling was mounting…. quickly

I felt completely horrible, my chest was trying to push its was out of my body and I was pretty sure that if I wasn’t able to get my heart rate down, quickly… bad things were going to happen

I was frustrated by this unwelcome turn of events… I had been responsible, damn it.  I had drank water!

I began to consider calling an ambulance… I didn’t want to…. God, I didn’t want to

but, I knew something was really wrong.

I absently went to Google, while I considered the option of getting help

and began to look up my symptoms…

Within the first page of returns, I began to feel a wave of familiarity wash over my shaken body

Dehydration?

Photo Credit: crossfitsiouxfalls.com

How in the Hell….. but, I drank all that water…  how could I possibly be dehydrated

Impossible.

….or not

Apparently consuming massive amounts of water, over a short period of time can dehydrate the hell out of you…

by washing all of the cool stuff out of your system

Relieved to know that death probably wasn’t in my near future, I returned to my bedroom

armed with the Brita water filter and my Kindle Fire

I sipped on water and browsed my Kindle until about 5AM

My heart rate had returned to normal, by that time

In all reality I was terrified to return to sleep…  I couldn’t guarantee, to myself,  that I wouldn’t awaken in that shitty dried-out half-dead condition again… and the drama queen part of my brain whispered deep into my ear that I may not even be lucky enough to wake next time

Finally I allowed myself to return to sleep.  I woke multiple…. MULTIPLE times.  Each time, I would take a few slow deliberate sips from my huge cup of water… and return to my slumber

Eventually morning came and my eyelids flickered opened

My heart rate was still normal…  Trust me, I know… I checked it about 27 times before I would even allow myself to sit up…

I spent the rest of the day… cautious

I moved slowly… feeling like I had been hit by a car

Every inch of every muscle, within me, ached

and to be honest, I felt cheated.

This single non-alcohol fueled experience easily outweighed any hangover… in the history of man

Ever…

Think you know the difference between right and wrong?

It’s all so easy, right?

In the words of… me, 2 days ago

Water is a fickle bitch

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