July 27, 2011 by Kim
It seems that a vast majority of my site’s hits, the last few days, are coming from 2 simple words.
Those poor JB seekers are probably deeply saddened when they click on their requested picture of “Justin Bieber with cool sunglasses” and end up with me.
Hi! I’m Kim.
But, anyway…. enough about Justin Bieber…. I mean, it’s not like I would INTENTIONALLY continue to use his name… Justin Bieber, JUST to get hits to my page.
and I would never EVER post pictures of the little mini-heartthrob, just to raise my numbers… Justin Bieber, in case you had forgotten what we were discussing.
Hello there, Justin Bieber. You’re looking extra Justin Bieber-y today
Wednesday is always an extra busy day of the week, for my section… reports are due, gossip is at its peak and weekend hangovers are finally beginning to fade. I noticed something, during the frenzied bustle of today’s activities…
Activiaaaaaaa… No, damn it.
Anyways. As I was rounding a corner, in a mad sprint for the network printer… my hip clipped a bookshelf. This has happened to me many a time before. Too many times to count.
I have hips. I have possessed hips since the birth of my first child… almost 16 years ago. I have had approximately 192 months to get used to my widened dimensions. Yet I always manage to “clip the hip” on something. It doesn’t even really faze me anymore… It may throw me off course for about 3 seconds, but I quickly recover and continue on my path. I suspect my friends may have turned it into a drinking game…
I may stumble, but I will not fall!
Once again, I come bearing tales of Project Manager T.
He said that every time he perturbs me I can add another letter to his name…
So lets call him Ti.
So Ti thought that it would be humorous to rig up the cabinet in my cubicle to explode the pressed out paper circles from the hole punch at me.
Is there a name for those things?
Google says they’re called “chads” which is humorous in its own way… but I’m going to stick to calling it confetti.
After a few hours passed with me failing to open the cabinet, Ti had a hissy fit, came barreling into my cubicle, shrieking, and flung open the cabinet above my head.
Apparently I screamed.
I think I blacked out…. I don’t remember screaming and if I did I probably wouldn’t admit it.
So, I did not scream.
Got it??? Did I scream? No.
At some point, in the afternoon, all of the confetti was transferred to the floor, chair and keyboard of Ti’s cube.
ATC suggested that I wrap my hand in tape to pick up the tiny white circles…
I grumpily declared that I would wrap up his head in tape and make him roll around on the floor to collect the mess.
I have to admit, though… the tape was a good idea. The confetti came up fairly easily and now I’m sitting here giving dirty looks to my 2 million dollar Kirby.
If they knock… play dead.