My Little Piece of Tanning Bed Hell…


July 13, 2011 by Kim

You know what really sucks… laying in a tanning bed when it’s 100+ degrees outside…

Sometimes it’s hard to find the motivation to walk in there, during this part of the year.

I live in the desert… summer temperatures have been known to reach about 125 degrees

and here I am willingly laying, for 12 minutes, in a heat emitting capsule.

It’s like heat, within heat, within heat.

Yes, there are fans… but having molten hot air blown at you is not exactly refreshing.

In an effort to keep my face from getting super dark, I usually place a towel over my head during my time in the tanning bed…

Yeah… that sounds invigorating… doesn’t it!

The last 3-4 minutes are always the hardest…  I find myself blinking through sweat drenched eyeballs towards the time display.

…4 minutes?  Are you freaking kidding me… how am I going to survive in this thing for 4 more minutes?  Come to think of it, how in the Hell has it only been 8 minutes so far? I swear I’ve slipped in and out of consciousness at least 10 times!

At this point I’ll usually wade through my pool of sweat and try to find a more comfortable position.  The direct heat is searing into my skin at the points of contact and I can feel my body screaming out for relief.

2 minutes left on the display… at this point I am at mental war with myself regarding whether or not I should jump my roasting ass out of the bed.  No one like a quitter.. and surely I can last 2 more minutes… what’s the worst that can happen.  I slosh around in my boiling sweat some more.

Once that display shows that remaining minute, it is on.  I lay in the bed…staring at the clock.  Tears and sweat co-mingling and rolling down my face.  I feel a determination take over my body that I haven’t experienced since childbirth.  I can do this!!!  Who runs away at the one minute mark!

I close my eyes and exhale.  Then I hear the sound… the sweetest sound I have heard all day.  A shrill beep and, at once, I am surrounded by darkness. 

Sweet, comforting darkness.


5 thoughts on “My Little Piece of Tanning Bed Hell…

  1. Noooo! Tanning BAD! Sunblock GOOD! 🙂

  2. See…I don’t have to worry about any of that. I couldn’t catch a tan if I ran full speed after it!

  3. Keep up the superb work , I read few articles on this website and I believe that your web site is rattling interesting and holds lots of great info .

  4. Kely says:

    Its become entirly clear to me why I want you as my co-writer…your full blown insane

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