Someone’s got Crabs…


May 31, 2011 by Kim

When we first bought Dickie his easel, I don’t think Hubs or I ever imagined that it would be used to drill terror deep into my heart.

I, like most moms, had pictured endless hours of abundant imagination and unstifled creativity washing itself across the board.

How wrong I was.

How very wrong.

The “never-ending” roll of paper that accompanied the easel was depleted within 48 hours.   Miles of unfinished tic-tac-toe games and crude kindergarten lettered “Richards” decorate a landfill somewhere nearby…

Soon thereafter the boys realized that the backing to the paper was pretty much a dry erase board.  So I had the pleasure of being continuely greeted by their “artwork” on a daily basis.

Now let me say, I am an “artsy” person… and I unfortunately have a really hard time faking enthusiasm for my kid’s half-assed projects… I try, but I know they see right through it.

Well, maybe they’ve had enough of me and my stuck-up artsy self.

This is what I came home to today…

Ummmm… I not completely sure what to make of this.

 I honestly do NOT know which boychild did this little work o’ art.  I can obviously rule out Dickie (unless he REALLY has me fooled as to his level of schoolwork)  I’m leaning toward Anthony but I can’t say that I’m 100%

Let’s break it down a little starting with the blue writing…

“I’m waching you! hehehe” printed cryptically next to a blue fellow with no nose.

At first glance I couldn’t tell if it said “waching” or “washing”

Oh, you’re “washing” me, you no-nosed freak!?!?  I don’t think so!

I’m going to assume waching = watching

I’m about 99.869% sure that is Ant’s handiwork

and if that’s good enough for Maury… it’s good enough for me

….now, the purple cursive above the looming blue statement says the exact same things

complete with misspellings.

However, for whatever reason, I’m really thinking that this is Daniel’s contribution to my stalker wall.

Great… 2 kids that can’t spell.  Awesome.

At the tip-top, one of my boychilds wrote ELLO and abused some helpless exclamation points the way I abuse ellipses…

Are they trying to convince me, at this point, that the phantom note writer is Australian?  I’m really not following their logic.


and the little “something special” underneath my accented greeting, which was originally thought to be a booger… was actually a sticker, Mr Crab’s eyes to be exact.

I don’t know where the rest of our little cartoon friend ended up…but, I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that he was Dickie’s contribution to this wall of terror.

His stamp of approval for the project.

So I figure, I’m either going to have to start sleeping or showering with one eye open.

depending on how you read into it…


3 thoughts on “Someone’s got Crabs…

  1. Wondermom says:

    That’s AWESOME! I really needed that today…

  2. 1. I think you should see what Urban Dictionary says for “waching”:

    2. If the spy is Australian, you are definitely in trouble. I heard they kill on sight, no questions asked.

    3. As for the crabs, I think you would be fine after an acid bath.

    Fantastic read, as per the usual. Your kids definitely sound special, and I don’t mean the “special” that the fat kid over by the swingset always says.

  3. The Hook says:

    Awesome post! You’ve got a knack for this blogging thing!

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