April 28, 2011 by Kim
I must, for this moment, put “addiction week” aside and come to you with a truely disturbing confession.
I am a HORRID mother!
I probably should have NEVER been allowed to procreate.
…. I don’t even know how they manage to call me “mom”
This, most recent, instance, began the night before Easter…
it all began so innocently…
with the dying of 9 hard-boiled eggs for the Easter Bunny.
It would have been 12, but I’m a shitty parent who wanted scrambled eggs the previous day…
so yeah, they were left with 9.
The night actually went surprisingly well.. 3 boys dyed 3 eggs each…
well, Dickie had to sacrifice 1 of his eggs to Hubs… but they’re besties, so it was no big issue.
Daniel, my oldest, was EXTREMELY proud of his “4-colored egg”
You would have thought that the “4 colored egg” sprang forth from his own loins…
the other, less than stellar, eggs found their ways into my boy’s bellies over the next few days.
But “4-colored egg”… he was special
and we weren’t gonna eat him.
He stared at me, with his little sticker eyes, from the kitchen counter Monday thru Thursday.
and then Friday came….
Friday came with a vengeance.
At 5:30AM I realized I needed to throw some kind of breakfast-y food into my bag and take my butt to work.
“4-colored egg” caught my eye
We stared at each other for about a half a moment and then I scooped “4-colored egg” into my food bag and rushed out the door.
At work, I found it really hard to bring myself to consume “4-colored egg”
He had managed to last 4 full days in my house, without incident.
I had to show him some kind of respect.
So, we just hung out most of the morning…
He watched me while I worked and listened in on my phone-calls…
Every time I glanced over at him, a little smile would creep onto my face.
AND I never once thought of throwing him at anyone!!!
He was my little compadre
But as morning drew into afternoon, I felt that familiar rumble coming from my tummy.
…and as they say “all good things must come to an end”
Goodbye, my friend
it was nice knowing you!
…and, no, I still haven’t told the kids 😦